Two years ago, I decided to open a cupboard in the master bedroom that has not seen light in ages. In this cupboard, we stored our photo albums; albums of our parents’ wedding, albums of the first birthdays of my brother and I. After struggling for a few moments to keep all of them from falling on me, I opened to one of the pages with a picture of me in bad lighting, front tooth missing, an awful haircut with bangs that weren’t even half the length of my forehead.
But oh man that was the most genuine smile that I have ever seen of me in pictures. I especially remember the day this picture was taken. I had a stupid head piece jewellery earlier that day, put on a famous bollywood song on full volume and danced awfully, but I danced like no one was watching while everyone was watching.
I was the girl who smiled very easily and made people smile very easily. It was a time when the baggage of self doubt, insecurity, shyness was completely alien to me. I lived life for the present, I looked forward to and cherished the small happiness that was earned from my interaction with friends, family and nature.
Even though I looked awkward in my hair cuts and skinny legs in all these pictures, they were my favourites; they portray me when I owned the highest magnitude of self confidence that I do not own today. I firmly believe that confidence can be reattained.
In my previous blog, I said how actions alone can transform the nature of your thoughts. An amazing way to do that is to do the same activities that got us excited when we were young. It could be just talking to a family member about a crazy thing you did when you were in that tender age or just spending some time watching your favourite Hanna Barbara cartoons or buying a coloring book and a pack of crayons and coloring it or eating a snack that you used to be crazy about.
This might sound too “poetic” to be true, but redoing all the things that made you happy as a child is a way of bringing yourselves back in time and experiencing the same emotions that you had those many years ago. It keeps you grounded, it makes you want to revive lost relationships, it makes the grass look greener and the air sweeter, it is what truly makes you understand what truly does matter in life.